I am in Varinassi, which they say is the oldest city in the world (3000-5000 years old). We arrived here by train from Kolkotta at 5 am, and upon reaching the Ganges river one could not believe how vibrant and busy it was a 6am.....people were packed in the streets....all in search of the water from the Ganges which they believe is sacred.....people were bathing, praying, singing, meditating.....and you name it. I was amazed by the business and vigor of the people so early in the morning....when I just wanted a shower, and clean sheets to lay down upon. The spirituality of the people is to be admired.....and I guess that is what strikes me is that the people of India have faith....there are many religions but they all believe in "GOD".....he or she may take many different forms but they still believe. They pray and then they pray more.....and that is something I aspire to do more of.....PRAY! Pray that love will fill my life and flow out to all those I meet. I guess you could say I needed to come to India to appreciate even more how much I value LOVE!...and today being my last day I find that I leave with mixed emotions...some might find it odd but I feel sad to be leaving......even though I so look forward to GREEN space and some QUIET time....but whatever the case I will never forget my time in India or the people who touched my life and my heart while I was here......I will carefully place them in my heart and fondly think of them as I fly home and return to my very simple life in Canada.
sadily my trip has ended on a sour note of sorts as my flight time conflicted with the train arrival time and I have to fly out of Varinassi instead of take the train with everyone else .....which costs more and changes the entire dynamics of my trip....but perhaps I needed this alone time to reflect and well shed a few tears on my own.
For those who shudder at the thought of visiting India...I will say it is not an easy trip and that being flexible and open minded is a must....a sense of humor also goes along way....but I learned about my and life certainly outwayed the heat, traffic, cockroaches, mice, and well so many differences from Canada.
The fact is I am blessed to live in Canada, no material things can provide the gifts that my time in India provided me with. I am humbled to have visited a place so different from my home and feel privledged to have been moved by the people I met along the way.
Namaste
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Being Present
Only one more day left in Kolkota then we take the train to Varinassi. Today we were able to be taken out to the slums of India. We visited a school set up along a railway line for people who live right along a rail line...talk about a humbling experience to realize that these people do not have running water, electricity, or any sewer system in sight...and as they lkive here you realize that where they moved from is perhaps even worse then their present conditions. The school was as simple as it can get at least 20 kids in a tiny room with 1 teacher and hot can not describe how I felt today. I was amazed with the grace and pride these children sang us songs and shared their work...one boy could not stop smiling.....and you can't help but ask yourself how it is possible to be so unhappy if a boy is so grateful and proud of what he has? I also was able to see sister Cyril again she affirmed in me how one can be present for everyone you meet....which is something I try so hard to do but fall short on so many occassions....after meeting me only once she remembered our conversation and made a point of speaking to me about the girl I had befriended at the school.....I only spent a few short hours with her but sister Cyril instilled in me that those few hours meant more than I will ever know and affirmed what I was feeling that it was a shame that I was not staying longer to get to know her more. Presence?? What will that look like back home...how will I cultivate that in my life? Sister Cyril asks for nothing in return she jsut gives....which can be difficult yet when I look at her I see how fullfilled she is because in doing this she sees the rewards later on.
Anyway I am off tomorrow to work with special needs children at one of Mother Teresa's buildings...no idea what is in store but I guess that is the power in this trip.....walking with my arms wide open waiting to see what gifts are in store for me.
Much love to everyone.
Joanne
Anyway I am off tomorrow to work with special needs children at one of Mother Teresa's buildings...no idea what is in store but I guess that is the power in this trip.....walking with my arms wide open waiting to see what gifts are in store for me.
Much love to everyone.
Joanne
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
From my facebook account
This is what I posted on my facebook account after a list of comments about my time at Jesu Ashram (a care center for lepers, HIV, and TB):
thanks everyone! I will need your prayers! xoxoxo
This gives me strength for what's to come. Following this I felt guilty for all the individuals with TB and HIV I also came across with who I was scared to shake hands with or hug or anything. Walking away and feeling like you have turned your back on someone God has possibly put in your path to show your love to is heart breaking. I knew that when given another opportunity I had to be stronger.I went to the sisters of charities today to sign up for some volunteer work this Friday. I felt like I should be in a home of dying individuals in need of God's love before they pass. When I went to the volunteer registration place the organizer said that I would be needed at an orphanage and I thought well that's in easy way out but a part of me felt like it wasn't where I was supposed to be. So I prayed to God and asked that He put me where He needs me. I would give the sister my two options and I asked that He use her to put me in the right spot. Well I was the last one called and so the sister said I get to pick and both had room for me. That didn't help! I told her I was hoping she would pick for me. She said that I would not be of use at the school since I wasn't here long enough so she placed me in the home of dying people. Right away a feeling of fear fell over me but I felt it was right. I AM SCARED but I feel this will force me to draw strength. Please pray for me.Miss you all. xoxoxo
thanks everyone! I will need your prayers! xoxoxo
This gives me strength for what's to come. Following this I felt guilty for all the individuals with TB and HIV I also came across with who I was scared to shake hands with or hug or anything. Walking away and feeling like you have turned your back on someone God has possibly put in your path to show your love to is heart breaking. I knew that when given another opportunity I had to be stronger.I went to the sisters of charities today to sign up for some volunteer work this Friday. I felt like I should be in a home of dying individuals in need of God's love before they pass. When I went to the volunteer registration place the organizer said that I would be needed at an orphanage and I thought well that's in easy way out but a part of me felt like it wasn't where I was supposed to be. So I prayed to God and asked that He put me where He needs me. I would give the sister my two options and I asked that He use her to put me in the right spot. Well I was the last one called and so the sister said I get to pick and both had room for me. That didn't help! I told her I was hoping she would pick for me. She said that I would not be of use at the school since I wasn't here long enough so she placed me in the home of dying people. Right away a feeling of fear fell over me but I felt it was right. I AM SCARED but I feel this will force me to draw strength. Please pray for me.Miss you all. xoxoxo
Embrace Panic
2 days in a row this is the closest to a routine that i have right now.....today was a hot day for me even though I spent most of the day in an airconditioned bus but after experiencing an Indian thunder storm it seemed as though things caught up with me as I sat and waited to be put on a list at the mission house for mother teresa's missionaries of charity....i will be going on Friday to help out with some special needs chilren in one of the houses....not sure what to expect but it will be nice to be around kids again and to warm up to the idea of teaching again.
The rest of the day.... while rushed was really informative as we visited some temples both of which were the most beautiful that I was able to see on my journey so far.....they were quieter and serene...not as crazy as the others that I have visited so far....if i could have I would have sat and found a place to mediate at the Krishna temple all day long.....it was so peaceful and there was GREEN space......as I walked I could feel as this wonderful clean energy around me and I so wished that I could have spent more time there....it was a great place to reflect on my journey so far.....and some might find it odd but I feel a sort of sadness that the journey is ending......
As my favorite quote states " Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away"......and I certainly have had those types of moments here...perhaps that is why there is apprehension and sadness....as I so long for such moments back home in comfortable Canada. The question to ask is how does one do that everyday in a place that so many would do anything to be able to visit let alone call home. I know with my head how blessed I am and hope that in coming to India I learn to feel with my heart just how blessed I truely am also.
I however will not miss crazy taxi rides in Kolkata one bit...I had the taxi driver from hell who had no idea where he was taking us and a 15 min drive took over 30 min. So when drivers don't follow traffic rules, it is hot/ stuffy, you are sweating in places you didn't know existed, and are breathing in scents you would rather not take in.....it ended up being the most unbearble experience ever.......needless to say my travel sickness kicked in...not to mention PANIC......and I am sure that i freaked out my travel companions as I had a mini panic attack. I just felt likeI could not breath and so wanted the trip to end.......for a farm girl used to open space this trip was the worst nightmare yet, and no amount of trying to be strong worked today......which in the end was probably a good thing as it reminded me that I am human. So as bad as it was I guess you could say I learned something about myself and will still be taking a taxi sometime tomorrow....praying that I get a different taxi driver. All the best to you.
Joanne
The rest of the day.... while rushed was really informative as we visited some temples both of which were the most beautiful that I was able to see on my journey so far.....they were quieter and serene...not as crazy as the others that I have visited so far....if i could have I would have sat and found a place to mediate at the Krishna temple all day long.....it was so peaceful and there was GREEN space......as I walked I could feel as this wonderful clean energy around me and I so wished that I could have spent more time there....it was a great place to reflect on my journey so far.....and some might find it odd but I feel a sort of sadness that the journey is ending......
As my favorite quote states " Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away"......and I certainly have had those types of moments here...perhaps that is why there is apprehension and sadness....as I so long for such moments back home in comfortable Canada. The question to ask is how does one do that everyday in a place that so many would do anything to be able to visit let alone call home. I know with my head how blessed I am and hope that in coming to India I learn to feel with my heart just how blessed I truely am also.
I however will not miss crazy taxi rides in Kolkata one bit...I had the taxi driver from hell who had no idea where he was taking us and a 15 min drive took over 30 min. So when drivers don't follow traffic rules, it is hot/ stuffy, you are sweating in places you didn't know existed, and are breathing in scents you would rather not take in.....it ended up being the most unbearble experience ever.......needless to say my travel sickness kicked in...not to mention PANIC......and I am sure that i freaked out my travel companions as I had a mini panic attack. I just felt likeI could not breath and so wanted the trip to end.......for a farm girl used to open space this trip was the worst nightmare yet, and no amount of trying to be strong worked today......which in the end was probably a good thing as it reminded me that I am human. So as bad as it was I guess you could say I learned something about myself and will still be taking a taxi sometime tomorrow....praying that I get a different taxi driver. All the best to you.
Joanne
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Journal Entries con't
July 25 @ 2:04am
Faith has brought you here (India) and faith will lead you in your spiritual journey.
July 29 @ 2:54 pm
Jaipur
Jaipur is beautiful. We arrived to a rainfall which was celebrated by this pink town. All the walls of the street were pink (actually a run down kinda red). Children were playing in the water that was flooding the streets. We stayed at the Holiday Inn where we were able to use their pool then eat at their restaurant (called cum bar). This city is covered by pink buildings. The first building was the city palace and it was very British with it's huge chandlers, carpets, and royal outfits. Here the "royal" family was definitely treated like kings and queens with full service (natural air-conditioning, heavy gold clothing for the queen who was transported via wheel chair due to the weight of her dress, a maze of rooms, and water that had to be brought in from outside India.) I found the decor and architecture more lively here with the colour and peacock doorways. then those in Delhi. Following this we went to the carpet place and it was neat to see all the steps taken for high quality carpets. I bought my first two saris here.
It was neat watching the people celebrate rain here. Children were in the streets playing in the water overflow, store owners sat back as water flood into their shops, and many came out of their homes and shops to stand knee high in the water and be grateful for the rain fall. It was like driving through a parade. We definitely do not have this same appreciation for rainfall in North America. We run inside and lock the door keeping the rain out and ourselves dry.
Day 2 in Jaipur
Today we took an elephant ride at amber fort and ran into Kirt the chef on tv. This is the second famous person I ran into here! Am I really in India? The art work here was amazing with the silver and gold trim walls. The golden triangle has given me so much beauty to look at. From the mosque, mosoleums, Taj Mahal, and palaces I have seen more beauty then I would have ever expected. Little did I know about the history that exists here.
A part of me feels, however, that I am still missing out on something however. I came here on a spiritual journey to build on my relationship with God and the His calling. I see the beauty here but I feel more guilty then anything for all the graces of experience I am receiving and the lack of work I am doing for Him. I definitely know He is here with me and I recal the high tower we climbed at the mosque where I stood in a small circular room above the city and feeling the wind blow right through me. It was so amazing. It felt like His presence in the wind blowing all around me. That still remains to be the most spiritual feeling I have had since I got here and that took place on day 2 and I am almost a week into this trip...
Heart Prints
Well I certainly had hoped to post more often on here but India is turning out to be a somewhat difficult place to find e-mail and phone service. So if you can let my mom and dad know i am OK I would much appreciate it. I am 4 days away from actually coming home which oddly seems bitter sweet and sad. I did not expect to be attached to a country so different from my own, there is lots i will not miss like horns insesently honking, the crazy crowded streets and well just having my oewn space but at the end of it all I feel so utterly blessed to have come on this journey. There is much I certainly would have liked to extend as there were people and places that moved me in ways I can not put into words right now.....and it's almost like leaving a loved one and missing them. With my journey is almost coming to a close I find myself wishing I could go back to certain moments inorder to do over or simply take in the moment again...and to be honest it is now that I am feeling that I am getting into the swing of things ...not to mention that I realize I have to go back to work and reality.
Kolkota how does one put it into words......busy is what comes to mind yet underneath it all there is order within what I would precieve as confusion. Loretto school is must destination for any visitor and feel blessed to have meet sister Cyril....when she spoke I felt as if i were the only person in the room.....she spoke in a way that so made sense to me ......and while we were strangers I could not help but feel connected to her and her vision for the girls she works with......one of my fellow travellers asked where did your vision for this school come from and she said her heart.......people may be confused by her answer but it made all the sense in the world to me. she has a quote in her office about leaving heart prints on people and that is what is one lasting impression I hope to bring back to Canada. It is evident that the girls of this school love this woman because she cares and is leaving heart prints on each and everyone of them.
Kokota is a place I could see myself visiting again as there is much work to do to help people less fortunate. We visited Sister Teresa's tomb and her mission and I have not decided if i will spend the day with the missionaries. I had an extremely moving moment prior to arriving in kolkota when we visited a ashram for people who have contracted leprosy, hiv and TB. We walked into a room with woman who have , are now disfigured and basically not wanted by society including family...simply put they are alone. I saw this woman with the brightest eyes...she had no fingers or toes and I don't know what happened but in the next moment her and I were hugging....she was so happy to have someone acknowledge her......in that moment I can honestly say that my heart led me. I hugged her and it felt so right.....and looking back I am not sure who needed the hug more. She began to laugh, took my face in her disfigured hands and kissed my cheeks. I was moved and humbled beyond words.......I could not help but cry and must say that the world in that moment seemed so real, simple, small and yet loving......
it's sad to think you need to come half way across the world to realize just how lucky you are....yet to realize that it really does not take much to connect with people and feel true love......it reminded me just how scared so many of us are to love...including me.
That simple moment spent with her will stay with me forever.
My intention today for those who read this is that you love as much as you get and let those around you know how much you care.....and when possible share that love with those who need it more than you might ever know possible!
Kolkota how does one put it into words......busy is what comes to mind yet underneath it all there is order within what I would precieve as confusion. Loretto school is must destination for any visitor and feel blessed to have meet sister Cyril....when she spoke I felt as if i were the only person in the room.....she spoke in a way that so made sense to me ......and while we were strangers I could not help but feel connected to her and her vision for the girls she works with......one of my fellow travellers asked where did your vision for this school come from and she said her heart.......people may be confused by her answer but it made all the sense in the world to me. she has a quote in her office about leaving heart prints on people and that is what is one lasting impression I hope to bring back to Canada. It is evident that the girls of this school love this woman because she cares and is leaving heart prints on each and everyone of them.
Kokota is a place I could see myself visiting again as there is much work to do to help people less fortunate. We visited Sister Teresa's tomb and her mission and I have not decided if i will spend the day with the missionaries. I had an extremely moving moment prior to arriving in kolkota when we visited a ashram for people who have contracted leprosy, hiv and TB. We walked into a room with woman who have , are now disfigured and basically not wanted by society including family...simply put they are alone. I saw this woman with the brightest eyes...she had no fingers or toes and I don't know what happened but in the next moment her and I were hugging....she was so happy to have someone acknowledge her......in that moment I can honestly say that my heart led me. I hugged her and it felt so right.....and looking back I am not sure who needed the hug more. She began to laugh, took my face in her disfigured hands and kissed my cheeks. I was moved and humbled beyond words.......I could not help but cry and must say that the world in that moment seemed so real, simple, small and yet loving......
it's sad to think you need to come half way across the world to realize just how lucky you are....yet to realize that it really does not take much to connect with people and feel true love......it reminded me just how scared so many of us are to love...including me.
That simple moment spent with her will stay with me forever.
My intention today for those who read this is that you love as much as you get and let those around you know how much you care.....and when possible share that love with those who need it more than you might ever know possible!
From my journal
It's really hard for me to blog since I have not the time or access. So I have been keeping a journal on my ipod and emailing them to myself when I have hifi. With that said, a few days ago I deleted the email acct on my ipod bc it wouldn't send out mail however in doing so I deleted my journal which is part of our course work!!!! Internet access and technology is NOT my friend here for sure! I CRIED for at least an hour like a student losing a term paper the night before it's due. I did manage to send 2 entries before the deletion so here they are.
July 28
On the way to Agra now. Delhi was not bad at all. I was expecting millions of people and everyone walking up against me. I actually feel safe here. The streets are busy with people, markets, children (young girls) dancing for money on busy intersections, markets, and dogs. In the busyness and broken side walks along the market place near our Metro Heights hotel it is safe. OH and ps...no one shit on my face when I got off the airplane! It does have its occassional stench but not as bad as everyone warned.
Day 1
We started off the day with mass at the Sacred Heart Cathedral and of course I thought what a perfect way to start this spiritual journey I am about to embark on. We were half an hour early so we waited in our tour bus and a bunch of little kids ran up to our window to wave and ask for money. Mass was perfect and in English. The intention of the mass was Lord teach us how to pray and the song was Here I Am Lord. In the homily the priest told us a story about a man wishing to see Jesus and his frustration with not seeing Him after 25 years of prayer. (Geez and I thought 3 weeks would be good enough :/) On the last year he yelled at God for ignoring his meditations. Jesus granted him 3 wishes. The first 2 were pretty useless but the last one he asked the Lord to ask for the grace of what to ask for. The Lord answered "Ask for the grace of contentment". I thought this would be a great intention every morning here in India.
Our next destination was the Imperial Hotel. It was absolutely gorgeous with its obvious British influence. We were met with security, a man in costume, and metal detectors. The second we walked in you would get a whiff of jasmine that covered the hotel and a real Chanel store. Little rooms off the hallway had water fountains that could be seen from your hotel suite window. This is where we had our $60 buffet lunch that would be similar to the Fort Garry brunch. However this brunch had Drew Barrymore in the building!!! Outside was a British veranda and a green lawn where we posed for many pictures...of course! I definitely did not feel like I was in India!
Following this we went to a Hindu temple where we were not allowed to bring in our bags or take pictures. At the entrance of the temple was a huge statue of a goddess with Gold plating all over. You had to be covered and have shoes put away as well. Following this we went to a smaller Hindu temple where we has the opportunity of putting a red dot on our head. Learning about the Hindu religion is so hard even if the whole country is covered by their gods and godesses. In fact there was a HUGE monkey god on one of the busy streets we passed by. It's totally different here!
Day 2
This was a packed day of history and religion. We got dropped off at a busy street and had to walk to a Sikh temple. Wallking through the busy street was kinda scary. I had to hold on to my bag tight and keep an eye to the person in front of me bc we walked in single file like you would through the dance floor at the bar with everyone staring at us all around. Here we had our shoes removed and a head piece put on our head. It felt nice and sacred here. The temple was placed where one of their prophets was beheaded. He sacrificed his life for the Sikh and Hindu people who were being forced to become Muslims. He said he would sacrifice his life it his people were left alone.
Then we took the rickshaw (bicycle ride) down the market in pairs. This was a cool experience and finally started to feel like I was in India with the narrow alleys and markets along the sides. This took us to a mosque where we were covered in a wrap, shoes removed, and cameras put away unless you paid a toll of 200 rupees. It was very different being in mosque. There is a sense of negative stigma being in a place like this due to the racial profiling that exists against Muslims in North America. Here in India, I feel that one must drop all notions and embrace every spiritual opportunity and the religious diversity that exists here. Being a straight up Christian (Catholic) this is very different for me. I am in a place where Christianity is a minority yet religion is everywhere.
Embracing where I was I was able to feel God. At this mosque was a huge tower which was maybe 9 or 10 stories high. There were four at each corner of the mosque like a castle. Well I climbed one through the narrow turning stairs. I reached the top which was maybe 5 meters in diameter. I stood against the chain window and looked down at India and felt it's beauty. Just moments before I was in it's grimy streets and from up here it was beautiful. Thinking...wow this is what God must feel looking down at all this and seeing the beauty that exists here. Immediately I felt the wind blow right through me like rush, I felt it was God. Here at this mosque, in India, I felt God's presence. It was precious, beautiful, perfect, and spiritual. I loved it!
Day 4-5 Agra
Here I visited different forts and mausoleums. I felt like I was walking through a museum here. At the red fort we got a sneak peak of the Taj Mahal. I was very excited. I stood where Shah Jahan (who built Taj Mahal) was imprisoned by his selfish son who didn't want his father to spend any more money on buildings. It was kinda sad to know that from where I stood I could see what Shah Jahan saw in his prison. From this far off distance he saw his great building he made for his wife and could not enjoy it. An hour later I arrived at the Taj and it was breath taking. Not worth describing however bc it would do no justice. It was huge and amazing but one I felt couldn't be fully enjoyed bc I did not have the ones I love by me. The Taj was made out of love and should be enjoyed by those you love. It's kind of a lonely feeling. I miss my family.
July 28
On the way to Agra now. Delhi was not bad at all. I was expecting millions of people and everyone walking up against me. I actually feel safe here. The streets are busy with people, markets, children (young girls) dancing for money on busy intersections, markets, and dogs. In the busyness and broken side walks along the market place near our Metro Heights hotel it is safe. OH and ps...no one shit on my face when I got off the airplane! It does have its occassional stench but not as bad as everyone warned.
Day 1
We started off the day with mass at the Sacred Heart Cathedral and of course I thought what a perfect way to start this spiritual journey I am about to embark on. We were half an hour early so we waited in our tour bus and a bunch of little kids ran up to our window to wave and ask for money. Mass was perfect and in English. The intention of the mass was Lord teach us how to pray and the song was Here I Am Lord. In the homily the priest told us a story about a man wishing to see Jesus and his frustration with not seeing Him after 25 years of prayer. (Geez and I thought 3 weeks would be good enough :/) On the last year he yelled at God for ignoring his meditations. Jesus granted him 3 wishes. The first 2 were pretty useless but the last one he asked the Lord to ask for the grace of what to ask for. The Lord answered "Ask for the grace of contentment". I thought this would be a great intention every morning here in India.
Our next destination was the Imperial Hotel. It was absolutely gorgeous with its obvious British influence. We were met with security, a man in costume, and metal detectors. The second we walked in you would get a whiff of jasmine that covered the hotel and a real Chanel store. Little rooms off the hallway had water fountains that could be seen from your hotel suite window. This is where we had our $60 buffet lunch that would be similar to the Fort Garry brunch. However this brunch had Drew Barrymore in the building!!! Outside was a British veranda and a green lawn where we posed for many pictures...of course! I definitely did not feel like I was in India!
Following this we went to a Hindu temple where we were not allowed to bring in our bags or take pictures. At the entrance of the temple was a huge statue of a goddess with Gold plating all over. You had to be covered and have shoes put away as well. Following this we went to a smaller Hindu temple where we has the opportunity of putting a red dot on our head. Learning about the Hindu religion is so hard even if the whole country is covered by their gods and godesses. In fact there was a HUGE monkey god on one of the busy streets we passed by. It's totally different here!
Day 2
This was a packed day of history and religion. We got dropped off at a busy street and had to walk to a Sikh temple. Wallking through the busy street was kinda scary. I had to hold on to my bag tight and keep an eye to the person in front of me bc we walked in single file like you would through the dance floor at the bar with everyone staring at us all around. Here we had our shoes removed and a head piece put on our head. It felt nice and sacred here. The temple was placed where one of their prophets was beheaded. He sacrificed his life for the Sikh and Hindu people who were being forced to become Muslims. He said he would sacrifice his life it his people were left alone.
Then we took the rickshaw (bicycle ride) down the market in pairs. This was a cool experience and finally started to feel like I was in India with the narrow alleys and markets along the sides. This took us to a mosque where we were covered in a wrap, shoes removed, and cameras put away unless you paid a toll of 200 rupees. It was very different being in mosque. There is a sense of negative stigma being in a place like this due to the racial profiling that exists against Muslims in North America. Here in India, I feel that one must drop all notions and embrace every spiritual opportunity and the religious diversity that exists here. Being a straight up Christian (Catholic) this is very different for me. I am in a place where Christianity is a minority yet religion is everywhere.
Embracing where I was I was able to feel God. At this mosque was a huge tower which was maybe 9 or 10 stories high. There were four at each corner of the mosque like a castle. Well I climbed one through the narrow turning stairs. I reached the top which was maybe 5 meters in diameter. I stood against the chain window and looked down at India and felt it's beauty. Just moments before I was in it's grimy streets and from up here it was beautiful. Thinking...wow this is what God must feel looking down at all this and seeing the beauty that exists here. Immediately I felt the wind blow right through me like rush, I felt it was God. Here at this mosque, in India, I felt God's presence. It was precious, beautiful, perfect, and spiritual. I loved it!
Day 4-5 Agra
Here I visited different forts and mausoleums. I felt like I was walking through a museum here. At the red fort we got a sneak peak of the Taj Mahal. I was very excited. I stood where Shah Jahan (who built Taj Mahal) was imprisoned by his selfish son who didn't want his father to spend any more money on buildings. It was kinda sad to know that from where I stood I could see what Shah Jahan saw in his prison. From this far off distance he saw his great building he made for his wife and could not enjoy it. An hour later I arrived at the Taj and it was breath taking. Not worth describing however bc it would do no justice. It was huge and amazing but one I felt couldn't be fully enjoyed bc I did not have the ones I love by me. The Taj was made out of love and should be enjoyed by those you love. It's kind of a lonely feeling. I miss my family.
Monday, August 2, 2010
I MISS MY FAMILY
Written Aug 2, 2010
It's officially a week and a day and it feels like a month. I am writing this for my family to follow up with what I am doing. Specially for you Grace since you asked. My first week was in the Golden Triangle. We started off our trip with a morning Catholic mass and you know exactly what I was thinking....HOW PERFECT!!! The choir sang the same songs we are used to with an Indian zing to it. Then began our travels to tourist sights which included many other religious areas for Hindus, Sikhs, and Muslims. The sights in the golden triangle (Delhi, Jaipur, and Agra) are outstanding and not worth describing bc that would do no justice. The Taj Mahal was breath taking but the whole time I wish I had my family with me and Francis holding me in his arms (awww tear). It feels like I am walking through history here. I didn't realize how much history India has.
From the golden triangle we took a train ride (20hrs+) to Darjeeling. Before getting on the train I had a FISH FILLET from McD(my all time fav as a child) and it tasted the same...it was great. The train ride was a hectic experience. You know how Carlo's camper has those side beds that are on top of each other....well that would be high class to what I had. It had the same idea of beds on top of each other row by row with six in a section facing each other and 2 against the wall perpendicular to that. I had one of the two perpendicular ones and the only thing separating me from everyone else was a curtain so I slept with my bags underneath me. The washrooms were disgusting....almost like a porta-potty. I did manage to find kids to befriend...of course...and I amazed them with my camera. I would take a picture then they would like to see the picture and this went on and on. I loved it!!!!
From the train station we took a bus to Darjeeling which is a town on the mountains (very similar to Baguio). We are literally in the clouds and ps it doesn't feel like cotton balls:( The beggars here were INTENSE! In the golden triangle I kept my head down and they left me alone. The train ride however made me realize that I wasn't happy about that. I am here on a spiritual journey...so why am I not acknowledging the poverty that exists. So instead I looked at them this time and that was hard. They would grab my arm, beg for money, show me eye scars (ie slum dog) and follow you to the steps of the bus. I took out 10 rupees and started discretely handing them to the individuals. There was an old woman that broke my heart. Outside the bus she begged for money desperately and complained of her aching back. All I could think about was Inang and her picking rice to feed our family in the Phil back in the day. There are so many times I hide my head to fight the tears (including right now as I sit in a bakery/Internet cafe).
Today in Darjeeling I let it out. We went to a place which helps out families. They teach woman to do handicrafts and there is a daycare for children. Of course when I hear children my automatic reaction is to go and play. We only had a few minutes with them because we were doing a tour ( I was the first one in the room and the last one out). They sang their ABCs and a brushing teeth song...priceless! When we were leaving the lady showed me two children whose family was in a house fire and the oldest one (3/4 years old) was left to care for the younger one. I CRIED and fought so hard to not bawl. :( I am learning so much about myself and really appreciating the life I live at home. Being in a third world country covered in poverty really challenges an individual! well that's it for now:) miss you all! xoxoxo
It's officially a week and a day and it feels like a month. I am writing this for my family to follow up with what I am doing. Specially for you Grace since you asked. My first week was in the Golden Triangle. We started off our trip with a morning Catholic mass and you know exactly what I was thinking....HOW PERFECT!!! The choir sang the same songs we are used to with an Indian zing to it. Then began our travels to tourist sights which included many other religious areas for Hindus, Sikhs, and Muslims. The sights in the golden triangle (Delhi, Jaipur, and Agra) are outstanding and not worth describing bc that would do no justice. The Taj Mahal was breath taking but the whole time I wish I had my family with me and Francis holding me in his arms (awww tear). It feels like I am walking through history here. I didn't realize how much history India has.
From the golden triangle we took a train ride (20hrs+) to Darjeeling. Before getting on the train I had a FISH FILLET from McD(my all time fav as a child) and it tasted the same...it was great. The train ride was a hectic experience. You know how Carlo's camper has those side beds that are on top of each other....well that would be high class to what I had. It had the same idea of beds on top of each other row by row with six in a section facing each other and 2 against the wall perpendicular to that. I had one of the two perpendicular ones and the only thing separating me from everyone else was a curtain so I slept with my bags underneath me. The washrooms were disgusting....almost like a porta-potty. I did manage to find kids to befriend...of course...and I amazed them with my camera. I would take a picture then they would like to see the picture and this went on and on. I loved it!!!!
From the train station we took a bus to Darjeeling which is a town on the mountains (very similar to Baguio). We are literally in the clouds and ps it doesn't feel like cotton balls:( The beggars here were INTENSE! In the golden triangle I kept my head down and they left me alone. The train ride however made me realize that I wasn't happy about that. I am here on a spiritual journey...so why am I not acknowledging the poverty that exists. So instead I looked at them this time and that was hard. They would grab my arm, beg for money, show me eye scars (ie slum dog) and follow you to the steps of the bus. I took out 10 rupees and started discretely handing them to the individuals. There was an old woman that broke my heart. Outside the bus she begged for money desperately and complained of her aching back. All I could think about was Inang and her picking rice to feed our family in the Phil back in the day. There are so many times I hide my head to fight the tears (including right now as I sit in a bakery/Internet cafe).
Today in Darjeeling I let it out. We went to a place which helps out families. They teach woman to do handicrafts and there is a daycare for children. Of course when I hear children my automatic reaction is to go and play. We only had a few minutes with them because we were doing a tour ( I was the first one in the room and the last one out). They sang their ABCs and a brushing teeth song...priceless! When we were leaving the lady showed me two children whose family was in a house fire and the oldest one (3/4 years old) was left to care for the younger one. I CRIED and fought so hard to not bawl. :( I am learning so much about myself and really appreciating the life I live at home. Being in a third world country covered in poverty really challenges an individual! well that's it for now:) miss you all! xoxoxo
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